Why can't things just be simple? Weren't they supposed to be? I promised myself that I wouldn't write about Jeremy after my breakup entry. Well you have seen how well I have kept up with that promise. Grrrrr! It is so frustrating because damn I care about that guy so much. And I truly thinks he cares about me too just not in the way I wished he would. Sometimes I wish that he was no longer in my life so that way I could much more easily move on with my life without the reminder of how great he can be and how great he was. One of my favorite quotes fits in here"Possibly the sore would soothe and heal if you just stopped picking at the scab."(from the book PLAYING AWAY). And other times I wished that I would have never gone past the friendship stage because as happy as I was when we were together, it isn't possible to miss what you never knew. But I know this is totally crazy but I really think Jeremy is in my life for some purpose. I truly think he needs me. Jeremy has some SERIOUS issues. See his mother got pregnant when she was fifteen and her parents are strong catholics so they made her give him up for adoption. She ended up running away and taking him back a week later. She then married Jeremy's father even though she didn't love him. They were divorced before he was in Kindergarden. He says a lot of negative things about himself because I think he truly thinks he is still not wanted. I really think that he doesn't want anyone to love him. He doesn't think that he is worthy of it. It upsets me so badly. I mean he can be an asshole. I've dealt with that first hand. But I truly think that is a cover up when he starts to feel real emotion. He is such a sweetie too. He doesn't like to admit that though. He told me recently that his niece Lexie was the best thing that ever happened to him. I mean when you see him with her you can see that he is such a great guy. I know I shouldn't do this to myself but there is come reason he is in my life. I'm not completly sure the extent of it yet. I do pray for him every night. Who knows, perhaps I'm doing this all in vain.

Your the boy cut. You love to get out and be yourself. Getting down and dirty is a very familiar thing to you. You live an active live style and you simply love it, you go where life takes you.

Which underwear are you?